SJ has been a patient of ours since 2012. After years of trying at another clinic, she underwent surgery with Dr. Miller, and then made the difficult decision to use donor eggs. In 2013, SJ and her husband welcomed twins! However, their family was not complete, and they welcomed another son last year! SJ understands the complexities of using donor eggs but hopes her journey brings awareness and inspiration to others in similar situations.
If you would like to learn more about our donor egg program, please contact Lindsey Bartscher (lbartscher at drcharlesmiller.com). Special thanks to SJ and her husband for sharing their inspiring story.
Our journey to build our family was a long one, but we are happy to say we are on the “other side” of infertility thanks to Dr. Miller and his wonderful staff!
We started trying to conceive in May 2009 when I was 29 years old. Both of our parents had conceived easily, and we were both healthy, so we didn’t expect to have any problems. Unfortunately, after a year of negative cycles, we started seeing a fertility doctor in June 2010. Despite all our tests looking normal, we did four IUIs that all failed. When we finally got to the point of doing IVF, we just expected it would work. Our first IVF cycle, I got pregnant and for the first time ever saw two pink lines! Even though my hcg numbers were low, I thought just the fact that I’d finally seen a positive pregnancy test meant things might work out. We lost the pregnancy around 5.5 weeks and quickly moved into a frozen embryo transfer (FET). That cycle failed, and we did two more IVF retrieval cycles and fresh transfers that both failed. After our third failed IVF cycle, my original fertility doctor suggested that we may need to use donor eggs. I was not ready to move forward with donor eggs then, so we tried one more IVF cycle with our original doctor. When that cycle failed, our doctor suggested not only donor eggs but donor sperm. We asked our doctor if he would be willing to perform further testing and a laparoscopy to test for endometriosis, since my sister had recently been diagnosed with it. When he refused, we decided it was time to switch clinics.
I had a friend who was able to get pregnant after a procedure Dr. Miller performed, so based on her recommendation and a lot of research, we decided Dr. Miller’s office was the right place for us to continue our journey. Dr. Miller was completely on the same page as us and understood that before we did donor eggs or donor sperm or another IVF, we wanted to be 100% sure we had tested for any potential issues like endometriosis or immune issues that could affect implantation of an embryo. Our motto was “no regrets,” so we wanted to make sure we had no regrets about our decisions on this fertility journey. Dr. Miller performed a laparoscopy after finding mild endometriosis, and he discovered I had homozygous MTHFR, both issues he thought could affect IVF success. We tried one more IUI cycle and one IVF cycle with Dr. Miller. After our first IVF cycle with Dr. Miller, he told me I had “soft” eggs and recommended donor eggs. He said he did not think we needed donor sperm, but he showed us the statistics on donor eggs and explained how such a cycle would work. Dr. Miller’s Donor Egg IVF Coordinator also gave us a lot of information on donor egg agencies and counselors.
After taking a few months to regroup and make sure we were ready, we decided to move forward with donor eggs in August 2012. Dr. Miller also added Lovenox and Medrol to my cycle due to my MTHFR and repeated IVF failures. We found an amazing donor egg agency (Graceful Conceptions) and moved forward with a fresh donor egg cycle in December 2012. The difference between our donor egg cycle and my egg cycles was night and day! We had so many more embryos to work with that we did with my cycles, and they were all top quality! We transferred two embryos on December 18th and were able to freeze five more high graded embryos. And right before Christmas I got two beautiful pink lines on a pregnancy test! It was the BEST Christmas gift we could ever imagine! We found out two weeks later that we were expecting not only one but TWO babies!
Our twins were born healthy in 2013, and we kept our frozen embryos for several years. Eventually, in 2022, we decided to try and expand our family. We knew it might take a few tries, but we got lucky and had success on our second frozen embryo transfer in May 2022.
We know some people are not comfortable with donor eggs, but Dr. Miller made us feel so comfortable about it, and he reminded me that with donor eggs I would still be carrying my children. We know our three beautiful children would never have been possible without donor eggs or Dr. Miller. We are forever grateful we decided to switch clinics back in 2012, and we are thankful Dr. Miller was so straightforward about donor eggs being our best chance of having a baby and building our family. We explained to our kids that donor eggs are just part of their story and something that makes them special, and they will always know how much they were wanted and loved! We hope our story gives other couples hope, especially when faced with failed IVF cycles. “Success” looks different for everyone, but we are blessed and grateful that our donor, Dr. Miller and science have made our family possible!
-SJ